19 August 2005

"THIS IS JUST MY DAY JOB"

why is it that we consider identity something to be lost?

we hide our identities. we guard them and defend them as if they are easily taken. we bind unimportant or irrelevant things to ourselves with the goal of making ourselves identifiable. that perhaps is the biggest irony. we hold fast to identities that are not real or are at least not representative of our true selves.

true selves...we are as unlikely to know ourselves as the next guy. i have this idea that the 'true self' exists, that buried somewhere in each of us is the person we are meant to be. sadly for us our 'identities' often hinder the exhibition of true self. i think this is one reason that i have stripped all identifying characteristics from this bit of on-line self-indulgence. no one else comes here, and if they do very few know what they are looking at. however, it is still somehow important to me that the thoughts left here have not been filtered through the impression i give to the world.

someone walked past me today wearing a t-shirt proudly displaying the title of this post across his chest. it seemed like a healthy sentiment to me, and i was surprised to see someone wearing it. most people don't tend to have such healthy sentiments...here by most people i mean me.

09 August 2005

fatigue

i've been so tired lately. i can't think and i can't focus ... an unfortunate reality when these are supposed to be full-time activities.

i hope this isn't an excuse.